How to Make a Pipe In a Pinch

How to Make a Pipe In a Pinch

James Bond, Ethan Hunt, Jason Bourne, MacGyver.  What’s the common thread that links all of these beasts?  Epic improvisation.  

With nothing but 2 toothpicks, a pack of silly putty, 9 marbles and a TV remote, any one of these guys could dismantle a foreign nuclear program.  Nothing says panty-dropper quite like David defeating Goliath with whatever happens to be lying around at the time.

And that’s why today we’re covering all the greatest ways to make a pipe in a pinch.

Old Faithful - Produce & Aluminum Foil
Requires: 

  • 1 Fresh Fruit or Vegetable
  • Aluminum Foil
  • 2 Toothpicks
  • Narrow-bladed knife

Step 1: Determine which side of the fruit or veggie will be the mouthpiece and the bowl

Step 2: Cut a bowl-shaped incision in one end

Step 3: Turn the piece 90 degrees, then push the blade straight in 3 times, forming a triangle

Step 4: Using the toothpicks and/or the knife, extract the triangular shaped wedge

Step 5: Make sure the bowl and air channel connect

Step 6: Tear a piece of aluminum foil to line the bowl

Step 7: Poke tiny holes in the bottom of the aluminum foil

Enjoy!


The Pen Pipe is Mighter than the Sword

Requires:

  • 1 pen with metal tip and plastic barrel
  • Hammer

Step 1: Disassemble pen

Step 2: Insert metal tip into plastic barrel

Step 3: Tap with hammer until secure


Homemade one-hitter!


Toke the Rainbow - DIY Starburst Pipe

Requires:

  • ½ pack of Starburst candies
  • 1 pen, pencil, or skewer
  • Microwave or bodyheat

Step 1: Unwrap the Starburst candies

Step 2: Stack all but one of them and press together

Step 3: Press the last one sideways onto one end

Step 4: Microwave for 3 seconds at a time until malleable

Step 5: Create bowl indention into the sideways Starburst

Step 6: Push pen into long side until it reaches bottom of indention

Step 7: Connect bowl to air channel with as small a hole as possible


Taste the rainblow!


Homemade TP Roll Steamroller

Requires:

  • Toilet paper roll core
  • Aluminum foil
  • Pen or pencil

Step 1: Puncture one end of the TP roll with the pen or pencil

Step 2: Form a cone with a small section of aluminum foil

Step 3: Twist or pinch the bottom of the cone until it will fit in the hole

Step 4: Pull from bottom of aluminum foil until secure

Step 5: Cover the end of the roll with your hand


Light that $#!t!


The Soda-can Pipe


Requires:

> 1 full canned drink

> Knife


Step 1: Turn can upside down (carefully)

Step 2: Place can over sink or somewhere outside

Step 3: Press tip of knife into can sidewall, near what is now the bottom (Mouth hole)

Step 4: Gently push tip of knife into wherever you want the rush hole

Step 5: Allow contents to drain fully

Step 6: Make small slits in bottom (now the top) of the can (Bowl)

Step 7: Rinse if you have a water source nearby


Spark that soda!


And there you have it, a few of the simpler ways to make a pipe from simple household objects.  Hopefully you won’t ever have to actually smoke from one of these horrendous contraptions, but if you do, at least now you’re prepared for the ordeal.


In the meantime, check out some pipes you’ll actually enjoy smoking out of.